I used to walk with the crowds

I used to join them in beautiful buildings, homes, even outdoor gatherings

to sing beautiful songs

to hold hands and pray beautiful prayers

Yes, I know the grasp of a friend's hand upon my own

I know the comfort of a friend's prayers

I know the gentle kindness of a friend's voice

I know what it is to be loved

I know what it is to love

and then see the joy in my friend's face when they see me

I used to walk with friends

I used to be called "friend"

I was not always this way

I was not always unlovable, broken, empty, so dead inside

But one day as I was walking with my friends

I noticed someone by the wayside

he was alone

he had no friends

no one reached out to take his hand and I wanted to

no one stopped and knelt to pray with him and it brought me to my knees

I heard mocking, cruel voices as I knelt there with him and tried to speak a kind word

but I was speechless as he lay there in the dirt

I was speechless so I just knelt there beside him

and watched my friends' faces as they turned and left

Yes, I once knew the grasp of a friend's hand upon my own

I knew the comfort of a friend's prayers

I knew the gentle kindness of a friend's voice

I knew what it was to be loved

and to love

then see the joy in my friends' faces when they welcomed me, embraced me, looked for me

But I no longer walk with the crowds

and they no longer look for me

they avoid me, walk past me, mock me

now I am unlovable

Was it all worth it?

now I lay here by the wayside 

filthy, bleeding, unrecognizable

now I lay here in disguise

seeing the truth of their hearts

the truth of our "friendship"

the truth of their false love

the truth of all that I once called "beautiful"

and was it all worth it?

Was it worth it to stop

and kneel down

and lose my beauty, my love, my dreams

to love one?

was it worth it to become unlovable that the unlovable might know love?

was it worth it to love him?

Perhaps you will never know

the look upon his face when I knelt beside him

perhaps you will never see

the scars in the hands that I took in mine

they were made by nails and a hammer and sinful, wicked, hateful men

perhaps you will never realize

that it was Jesus I chose

that it was Jesus I saw

that it was Jesus who was beside me

that it was Jesus I loved

It was worth it

Who has believed what he has heard from us? 

And to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed? 

For he grew up before him like a young plant, 

and like a root out of dry ground; 

he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, 

and no beauty that we should desire him. 

He was despised and rejected by men; 

a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; 

and as one from whom men hide their faces

he was despised, and we esteemed him not. 

Surely he has borne our griefs 

and carried our sorrows; 

yet we esteemed him stricken,

smitten by God, and afflicted. 

But he was wounded for our transgressions; 

he was crushed for our iniquities; 

upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, 

and with his stripes we are healed. 

All we like sheep have gone astray; 

we have turned—every one—to his own way; 

and the LORD has laid on him

the iniquity of us all.

He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, 

yet he opened not his mouth; 

like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, 

and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, 

so he opened not his mouth. 

By oppression and judgment he was taken away; 

and as for his generation, who considered 

that he was cut off out of the land of the living, 

stricken for the transgression of my people? 

And they made his grave with the wicked 

and with a rich man in his death, 

although he had done no violence, 

and there was no deceit in his mouth. 

Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him; 

he has put him to grief; 

when his soul makes an offering for guilt, 

he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days; 

the will of the LORD shall prosper in his hand. 

Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied; 

by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant, 

make many to be accounted righteous, 

and he shall bear their iniquities. 

Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many, 

and he shall divide the spoil with the strong, 

because he poured out his soul to death 

and was numbered with the transgressors; 

yet he bore the sin of many, 

and makes intercession for the transgressors.

-Isaiah 53

"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.' Then they also will answer, saying, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?' Then he will answer them, saying, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.' And these will go away into eternal punishment..."

-Matthew 25:41-46

Copyrighted material, used with permission.